Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Revisiting the Archives

Entertainment News has unofficially been online for two years now, so I thought it would be prudent to go back and revisit some of the web log entries from the past and provide necessary updates and add further sarcastic commentary.

I summed up the 2006 FIFA World Cup Presented by Adidas and now it deserves some commentary since we are a little more than a week from Euro 2008. Think of it as a mini-world cup, or better, half of a world cup. Instead of 32 teams from around the world including half from Europe, we get 16 teams, all from Europe. In a related note, watch for the Second Annual Entertainment News Soccer Week in August right after Shark Week.

I wrote The Overlooked Sub-Genre after the release of 2006's straight-to-video Air Buddies, a distant sequel to 1997's Air Bud about a dog that plays basketball, which, believe it or not, was based on a true story. Things sort got away from actual events over the years and after Air Bud Spikes Back ("A dog that plays volleyball helps investigators solve a rash of mysterious crimes"), the producers branched out and went on to talking puppies and their crazy adventures. Recently released was Snow Buddies: "Disney's adorable talking puppies are back and this time they venture to the frosty arctic and team up with new friends in a thrilling dog sled race across Alaska. When the going gets tough the daring dogs have to band together with their new friends Talon and Shasta and muster up the courage to face the fur-raising challenges ahead. But will they have what it takes to win the race and find their way back home? Join the Buddies for more fun and more action in this all-new heartwarming film about the power of teamwork and following your dreams featuring the all-star voice talents of Dylan Sprouse (The Suite Life of Zack and Cody)." If that's not enough, later this year, we can expect to see Space Buddies. I don't know what it's about exactly, but based on the title it shouldn't be too hard to guess.

In The Best of Reality TV I spotlighted two contrasting TV shows. One was Morgan Spurlock's 30 Days which returns to FX June 3. Also look for Morgan's new movie Where in the World Is Osama Bin Laden? coming soon to theaters or video or TV, I'm not really sure. Also in "The Best of Reality TV" I introduced people to Dog the Bounty Hunter, that crazy biker-looking dude who hunts down fugitives in the name of justice. I followed that up with the web log entry Dog Bites Own Foot where I talked about Dog's woes and the suspension of his show. However, I also predicted that he would be back and I was right. A&E has decided that Dog has been punished enough (Translation: we think we can get enough sponsors to buy ad space during his show) and Dog will be back on the air soon. However, if you just can't wait that long, you should check out Bounty Girls: Miami. Remember how I described Dog the Bounty Hunter as Cops but with the white trash doing the chasing? Well, Bounty Girls: Miami is essentially four female Dog the Bounty Hunters chasing fugitives. So I guess the show should be called Bitches the Bounty Huntresses.

I'm still looking for help in deciding what group or artist musically defines this decade.

The entry most in need of updating is Fletch Lives Again. It now appears that Gregory McDonald is out as director and Zach Braff will no longer play Fletch. Instead we're looking at perhaps Mighty Ducks and Dawson's Creek star Joshua Jackson as the title character, which of course is just plain retarded. Also in that I web log entry, I spotlighted the abundant female beauty of JD's many escapades on Scrubs. Since then, Season 7 went by and sadly no one can be added to that list. Sure the season was shortened by the strike, but JD could have dated at least one hottie out of his league. Speaking of which, one of the girls on that list is Juliana Margulies who appeared on The Sopranos as one of Tony's would-be flings. Can an actress hook up with two more opposite characters than Dr. Dorian and Tony Soprano?

Last year I did a recap of the 2007 NBA Playoffs, but opted not to this year because my comments would be exactly the same. Instead let me be briefly say that I was really into this year's NBA season, but once the Jazz were eliminated, I abandoned the NBA cold turkey. Could it get any worse than Lakers, Spurs, Pistons, Celtics? Seriously. Maybe if the Knicks or Pat Riley were somehow involved, then it would be worse. I will say this about Kobe Bryant. I don't get why the media people love him. Yes, he's very talented, but he's also the worst teammate in recent NBA history with his public trade demands and open criticism of his teammates, not to mention is on-court tantrums where he refused to shoot just to show how bad his teammates are. Now, after the suspiciously lopsided Pau Gasol trade the Lakers are winning and suddenly Kobe Bryant is a media darling and Michael Jordan reincarnated. I don't get it.

Also last year I did a big Summer Movie Preview, but really didn't see very many of the summer movies until months later so this year I'll keep it brief by saying I'm interested in seeing Indiana Jones and Batman, and maybe Hancock and Iron Man, but I'm in no real hurry to see any of them.

Back in June of last year I commented on The New Mystery Science Theater 3000. To be more specific I spotlighted the work of Mike Nelson and his venture He also uses former MST3K pals Kevin Murphy (Tom Servo) and Bill Corbett (Crow). Since that post I have merged their wisecracking MP3's with six more DVD's to augment my total Rifftrax library to eight. So essentially I have the Mystery Science 3000 version of X-Men, Fellowship of the Ring, Casino Royale, Fantastic Four, The Bourne Identity, Transformers, Independence Day and Jurassic Park. Next, I'm considering Harry Potter or Raiders of the Lost Ark. Any suggestions? As a further update, the guy Mike replaced on MST3K was Joel Hodgson, who apparently is also trying to cash in on the Mystery Science fan base. He has launched a project called Cinematic Titanic, in which he and a bunch of fellow comedians including Trace Beaulieu (Dr. Clayton Forrester, Crow) and Frank Conniff (TV's Frank) make fun of old movies. I'd be curious to hear how the each feels about the other's venture.

Finally, back in November, I posted a video I spliced together entitled The Best of Kevin from The Office. As a follow up, below is a video (2:30) from the recent season finale of The Office with Toby's replacement Holly and how she thinks Kevin is slow, you know, in his brain.

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