Entertainer of the Month: Doug E. Doug

The polls are closed and pulling away late in what turned out to be a land slide, January's Entertainer of the Month is Doug E. Doug. Early on in the voting, four entertainers, LL Cool J, David Bowie, Neil Diamond, and Doug, emerged in a tight race that seemed like it would go down the wire. But as the race went on Mr. Doug seemed to gather momentum and finished 10 percentage points ahead of the competition. Some are pointing to voter irregularities and I myself do suspect ballot box stuffing (Worthington?). Nevertheless, I am certifying the vote and declaring Doug E. Doug the winner. As for the other 19 candidates, they all presented themselves well, except of course for Kirstie Alley, who failed to garner even a single vote. Better luck next January. As for Mr. Doug (real name: Douglas Bourne), he hasn't been up to much lately. He was pretty big stuff for a brief run in the 1990's with starring roles in some Disney hits including Cool Runnings with John Candy, Operation Dumbo Drop with Danny Glover and Ray Liotta, and That Darn Cat with Christina Ricci. He plaid wacky neighbor Griffin Vesey in Cosby, Bill's not-quite-as-successful followup to The Cosby Show. Other notable roles include Eight Legged Freaks (pictured below) with David Arquette and a not-yet famous Scarlett Johansson, and Shark Tale. His most recent acting credit is voice work in the Cartoon Network show My Gym Partner's a Monkey. He was in an episode that also featured Ziggy Marley. Apparently now he's a high school teacher in New York or something. For those that miss him, one of his earliest films Hangin' with the Homeboys will be on Comedy Central a few times this week. Trivia: In That Darn Cat, Doug E. Doug plays Agent Zeke Kelso, a role that was filled by Disney super star Dean Jones in the original 1965 version of the film. Jones also appears in the 1997 version, this time as Mr. Flint. In honor of characters named Kelso, the new poll question (right) asks who is your favorite Kelso: Ashton Kutcher as Michael Kelso from That 70's Show or Ken Jenkins as Dr. Bob Kelso from Scrubs.

Heir(s) Apparent

The physical comedy of the comedic fat man has been around as long the the joke. Still, I consider John Belushi the first modern king of the funny fat guys. His crown was surrendered upon his death and later claimed by Chris Farley, who too died on the thrown. I've been waiting and wondering who is the rightful heir. After seeing Orange County, I was certain it was Jack Black. But then Cedric the Entertainer emerged on the scene. However, with his new movie Paul Blart: Mall Cop opening today, Kevin James is staking his claim. But there can be only one king. Who will it be?